I'm Still Going...(the good, the bad, and the tired)
It's been a month now since I began my Journey to Fitness. It has been an incredible and beautiful journey of strengthening, releasing weight, mental growth, and self-awareness.
HA!
The true part is it's been a month. For one month now, I've gotten up and dragged myself to the gym three times a week. If I'm completely honest, it's been HARD. I'm not seeing results like I hoped for and after four weeks, my body is still in shock, I'm fatigued and I'm sore in weird places. On gym days, I come home so tired I can't even think straight.
On day one, I didn't think I would survive the first workout. The urge to puke was alarmingly strong and the realization that I couldn't lift five pounds was disturbing. I went home dejected and exhausted. I think I napped about four hours that day.
By day three, I wanted to cry in the shower, but I didn't have the strength. All week I was secretly hoping to be run over in the parking lot to put me out of my misery.
So, if it's been so hard for me, why don't I just quit? Believe me, I wanted to but here are the reasons I didn't:
I'm not doing this for anyone but me. The weight I put on the last several years is just too much and the lack of exercise has made me weak. I've never been this weak or heavy before and I don't like the way it feels.
I made a commitment to myself. Even though it's been tough, every time I get up and go back to the gym, I'm teaching myself that I can trust the promises I make to myself.
I have been on harder journeys and made it through. I'm going to stay positive; I can do this.
This is another way of learning to love and care for my body and myself.
As a healer, I want my clients to know that I've faced struggles also. I'm learning my own lessons and I'm doing my best to improve myself every day. Some days are harder than others.
So, all joking aside, the good news is I have released a few pounds and it is getting a little better each time I go. I'm sure I'm getting stronger, and my stamina has definitely increased (I haven't wanted to die once this week!). That really feels great and it's keeping me going.
I know if I don't give up, it will continue to get better, easier. I still have quite a way to go but I am embracing this journey as it comes and every day, I'm thankful and grateful for each step in the right direction.
Have you begun your journey? Tell me about it. If you haven't yet, I hope you've been inspired to begin now. If you need a little help deciding which path to take or a little encouragement, please reach out to me. It's more fun to travel life's path with friends!